Since I was little I thought if I climbed to the top of a tower, then I'd be able to see anything, no matter how far away it was. That if I just stepped off I would be able to walk on the clouds, and keep walking.

The Reason i  want to spit these creaky old memories out
is because i don't have any other proof of my existence.
The future that i thought i had grabbed a hold of
is a contradiction of dignity and freedom.
The reason i want to wipe away this distorted afterimage
is because i see my own limitations within it
In window of my overly self-conscious self
is last year's calender, without any date written in it.

I'll erase it, and rewrite it
with this nonsensical surrealism
and unforgettable sense of presence
And return from the brink, and rewrite it
Even meaningless figments of imagination
can be the driving force that gives you form 
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I really don't know where i am going with this blog
I want to say everything that i'm feeling but some how.. i feel inspired..
Soo whether this blog gets popular or not i will continue to update it, in hopes that some one will read it and get inspired from what they see.
So in short words. i want to inspire people.

~Since I was little I thought if I climbed to the top of a tower, then I'd be able to see anything, no matter how far away it was. That if I just stepped off I would be able to walk on the clouds, and keep walking.

Shed a tear 'cause I'm missing you I'm still alright to smile

I think about life.. can sometimes we go back to the way things were?
We All lost somebody in life, and losing doesn't mean death necessarily. Losing can be having a person break your heart, having them move away, rejected love, and including death.


We all grieve in the shadow..We all see the light but to step into the light and embrace it is the hard part, the thought seems easy but the action is what scares us the most. Some of us find comfort in this sadness and make it our reality


It doesn't have to be a reality, life is an illusion. Illusions are mental... hence life is mental.. not saying go out and fly but life is how you shape it. Trying to Embrace reality is not the best thing in the world. some of us need that illusion. Some of us need to keep hoping, dreaming to keep our spirits alive. 


~ you idiot, its okay to feel pain

February, been so lonely. It's been so long since I felt your touch, and I couldn't care less if I deserve this. I will never survive the sting inflicted.

Its been a while since i saw you. we used to be an item, then we turned into friends and even though it kills me to know that you are away everyday, i accepted the pain, i accepted being your friend because i knew that if that beautiful smile of yours was to ever fade away it would have hurt more.
I accepted it, i swallowed my feelings and even though they came back i tried hard to suppress them. i smothered them with a pillow keeping them at the depths of my heart. I buried myself alive, and even though i'm six feet underground, i can't help but bang on this casket, hoping you come to dig me out, but the more i hope the more lost i find myself.
now our friendship has turned into something of a casual acquittance. i feel you just talk to me only to keep the heart faintly beating on our dying promises..
I'm sorry, I can't have you in my life...
Every day i feel like a bottle of venom has been poured into my heart to the point i can't feel anymore..
So this is my goodbye.


~You speak of awe, and make every word taste sweet

1st post

Well i need a place to keep my thoughts, i want to see how i progress through out the days of my life.. and maybe one day i'll reflect back on these entries and think of myself as a stupid for having such delusion branded into my head.
the name Xibalba is a place of Fear in Mayan and Mictlan is the underworld in Aztec.

So with this said, let me introduce you into a place where my thoughts are left like a sword without a sheet